2004-01-07 - 2:24 p.m.
Finally i am back!! Hope you didn't miss me too much. Alot has happened since i last wrote and I'll try not to bore you too much. Let's start with broodboy Paul:
Yes he came back to town and yes just as i wished it started Broodfest 2003, which has now become Broodfest 2004. It was great that first week he was back. Hubby was working and I got to hang out with Paul and we laughed and had fun and then just like Angel he morphed into Angelus. It started when I got really upset because he wrote in his journal that I seemed to want more than friendship and how he REALLY didn't want to have sex. I thought we had settled this long ago, I'm married and hubby would kill us and make us a movie of the week or he's be on Fox "When angry husbands attack!!!!" Anyway I told him this and he seemed reassured then I got in a fight with hubby and became depressed so I called him thinking he could make me feel a little less suicidal. Then he writes in his journal that he thinks I don't really mean it and I was trying to get attention from him because he had ignored me earlier that day for his friends. How self-absorbed can one 22 yr old male be? Then BroodFest turned into Nightmare on my street. We had made up over the phone incident and then hubby got plastered and called Paul's parents house and left a rather shall we say threatning message. So Paul's parents felt he shouldn't continue this friendship and he called the friendship "abnormal". I'm struggling with trying to forgive him for that little comment. But for now I'm letting it stay where it is until my life is more settled.
My grandmother came for her visit and she drove me crazy. I know she's given me alot of money but she kept watching every penny that i spent. Nothing i did while she was here made her happy and she really dislikes my husband(Yeah, we're all with you on that one grandma!) I decided that nothing will ever please her and I just have to accept that and love her anyway.
Now for an update on my escape from the nightmare that is my marriage. I'm more involved with my church and they are helping me with resumes and getting job interviews. I should have a job soon and a place to stay till I get my own place. I'm trying to watch what I eat too. Usually I eat more when I'm distressed but I know that would only make hubby have one more thing to hurt me with so I'm not giving him that. Hope everyone had a great christmas and is having a good year so far.